In Review

A fine few days. Friday I did the Hendrix Alumni Playwrights’ Theatre. I emailed a few people about it but I made the mistake of saying my parts were small so it might not be worth the drive, and this was dumb. The plays were highly entertaining and I should have forced everyone to come. Plus there was free cheese and snacks. Plus I played one of my roles as Mitch Hedberg, essentially. Everyone seemed to laugh at me a lot. But in a good way.

Saturday Heath and Mary Beth came in from Oklahoma City to visit. We watched the new Kicking and Screaming Criterion DVD with the old gang (Adnan, Kelly, Juan) and other fans (Katherine, Jason) over at Adnan’s swank new digs in The Heights. Apparently I’m now an adult as I envy him his IKEA furniture.

Which reminds me. I have money in the bank now. I’ve arrived at a point in my life in which I’m getting paid more and actually buying less. So it’s probably time to start buying things that normal people buy, i.e. furniture, a new TV, a better stereo system, etc. More on this story as it develops.

Also Saturday Bryan and I played a gig at Whitewater Tavern. It went well. I never really know how it goes, actually. I just stand there and play and no one complains. I wonder what I need to do for people to get excited.

Monday Danya and I went to see Nada Surf at Juanita’s. Great show. And long. I’m more than a little surprised that I’m still conscious right now. Afterward I met this girl Holly Ingebo, because I thought she was someone else. It’s going to continue to bug me, not knowing why she seems familiar. We talked briefly and were unable to figure it out. I mention this only because I want to put her name on the web so that maybe she’ll Google herself and contact me because I didn’t get her phone number.

They’re Getting Smarter

I got two emails today in my spam box that were very similar in structure and content. The first:

I’ve been on this project, that you were looking here at

http://www.whatevercrappyspamdomain.com/crappy

cebastian just told to me that you unquestionabaly became aware about the arrangment on feeling like you did in college, Oh forgot, there also great at supporting me on sheding those xtra pds.

Then the boy returned to one of the upper rooms, and in spite of the hardness of the glass bench was soon deep in slumberland And how about the next three gifts? inquired the boy, anxiously

The second:

Just wanted you to hear from u about the diet, was it at

http://www.anothercrappyspamdomain.com/crappier

geweyne narrated to me that you unquestionabaly heard about the info on droping pds, Oh forgot, there also great at helping me on getting lean again.

If there was any other place to go, I’d like to go there
At once a crowd of excited people assembled, shouting to one another and pointing towards him in wonder

Wow. Actual attempts at coherence and sentence structure. I like that they both use “unquestionabaly,” for some reason. An attempt at gravitas, perhaps? Next thing you know, they’ll be able to find Sarah Connor.

Vanity Fair

I used to think Vanity Fair was People Magazine for the Upper West Side, but apparently they’re snarkier and more inventive than I thought. Inside the October 2006 issue of Vanity Fair is a fake flap you can attach to a copy of The Weekly Standard. Check it out.

Sadly, in order to get one of these, you have to buy the latest issue of Vanity Fair, which is the All Suri Cruise Edition (see, I was right – a highbrow People Magazine). I’d feel more than a little dirty buying such a thing. Maybe I can surreptitiously snag the insert from a newsstand copy. What other choice do I have?

My friend Mary took issue with my dis of VF, as she’s a subscriber. She cited the excellent photography and political articles, and these are valid points, but I think my objections are mainly that it very often covers the same topics as People magazine (Tom Cruises’ baby, Jennifer Aniston’s relationships, Angelina Jolie’s drama), but in a more artistic fashion, with better photography….however the covers are still invariably celebrities and the primary reason people buy it is to read about famous people.

They sneak in some legitimate journalism, though – and I’ve noticed that Rolling Stone has taken on a similar pattern: put Justin Timberlake on the cover, and maybe people will happen across the articles on Darfur and Iraq. I guess I can’t blame them; celebrity sells. I suppose I should be thankful that they even attempt to edify.

It’s interesting that both magazines took their names from works of social criticism. William Makepeace Thackeray’s Vanity Fair was a satire on high society opportunism, and Bob Dylan’s “Like a Rolling Stone,” addresses a woman who has fallen from high social standing. And this month both magazines sport covers of two of the most vacuous idols of our society, Tom Cruise and Justin Timberlake, respectively.

I’m #1!

Last June I made up a word, “inspiratorial,” and just today I discovered I’m #1 in Google for it, out of some 140 pages! I rule!

Most of the other sites in the SERP[1] are blogs, which means I’m more important than all of them. This feeds my little nerdy ego a glorious repast. Granted my ego is roughly the size of a walnut and I keep it in a barren cupboard, fed only by occasional trips to Banjo Center.

1.) Search engine nerd lingo for “Search Engine Results Page.”

Unkind

This subtle anagram was mentioned in the crossword puzzle documentary Wordplay, and when Quentin, our graphics guy at the office, got a hold of a cache of several thousand corporate logo files, I had him make me this:

Dunkin Donuts

Dammit All!!

Bryan just got an offer from the ACAC to play the annual Vino’s Halloween Cover-Up, wherein various local bands choose a musical “costume” by performing cover tunes by a particular group. In this case, Sao Paulo would be Radiohead.

I can’t do it because I’ll be in NYC that week.

Gaaaaa!!

Zoe Goes Home

Zoe is off to Utah today. Matt’s friend picked her up sometime this afternoon, so this is my first day in well over a year of coming home to no dog. It’s a bummer. I went to the backyard and found that Stinkfoot had killed a mother mouse and was in the process of taking out a baby, so I prevented that. I don’t need any more depression around here.

I’m really going to miss having Zoe. She was the best dog anyone could ask for – she was talented, intelligent, and did what she was told, most of the time.

No more frisbee. No more trips to Petsmart. No more walks through Hillcrest at sundown, like we did last night. I picked up some Chinese food and gave Zoe some choice pork bits as we sat in front of the post office.

On the bright side: no more fleas, no more cleaning dog hair off the rug and bath mat, no more worrying about her constant scratching, no more smelly house and car. And I can wake up on weekends whenever I want now.

It was about a 60/40 split on giving her up. I’ll probably start bawling later tonight or tomorrow as I start to realize how much of a part of me I’ve lost.

My Lame Weekend

I have an unfortunate habit of not planning my weekends. And I really should learn that, particularly with a 3-day weekend, plans need to be made. Otherwise I run the risk of doing nothing and feeling bad because I wasted a great opportunity. I could have taken a road trip, I could have organized an outing of some kind. Here’s how lame my weekend was:

Saturday no one was around. I ran random errands, took Zoe to the park, and tried to find something fun to do. The weather was beautiful and the dog park was EMPTY. Kind of amazing, really. I also read a lot, played guitar a lot. That was it. Sunday I tried to get someone, anyone, interested in seeing the last baseball game at Ray Winder Field. No takers, although Kathy and some friends tried to make it but the game sold out just after their arrival. I made it in, but there were no seats, and the lines for beer and hot dogs were crazy long. I gave up and went home during the first inning. I had coffee at Sufficient Grounds with Jessica, and caught up with Frisco (my first LR roomate, recently returned to town from Tokyo). He came over laster with Kirsten from Sandalwood Forest and we watched the DJ Shadow and Cut Chemist “Brainfreeze” DVD.

But here’s the best part: Saturday I knew that nothing was really on the horizon, so I thought I could maybe run up to Harrison or something. The one thing that kept me from doing so was that Don Caballero were playing at Vino’s Sunday night. So I went, assuming that the show started at a normal time, like 8:30. But no. On Sundays, Vino’s closes at 9, so the show started at 6. I got to see all of 30 minutes of the band’s set.

Sigh.

Today I played guitar all morning. I went to Target, grabbed some lunch at Quizno’s, and finished reading the plays I’m doing in a few weeks at Hendrix.

The sad thing is that the weather was so nice this weekend that I just wish I could have done more with it. Must Plan Ahead.

In other news, Zoe will be leaving this week. Matt called. A friend of his is driving to Salt Lake City, and can give her a ride. I’m sure I’ll regret it later, but that dog is such a handful. She really does demand a lot of attention.

Oh, and to top it all off…Steve Irwin is dead.

Parent for a Day

Monday night and all Tuesday I took care of Madeline, Jennifer’s daughter, while Jenn is on the road. Madness, as I like to call her, is 8 and quite the handful. I got to do all the fun things parents do – get food, walk the neighborhood, play board games, get to bed, wake them up, drive to school, etc. I stayed at her house in Cabot and if I learned one thing, it’s that I could never fathom living in Cabot and driving to work in Little Rock every morning. It’s utter hell, and I only work in North Little Rock. The only thing worse is trying to drive back into Cabot at 5pm.

Seriously, though. Kids. I get along well with them because I’m still one of them, despite my height and mortgage. I wish I could say I look forward to having them, but really I don’t look forward to the first 5 years. Babies I have no use for. Give me a kid that is verbally coherent and fully mobile, and I’m good. If only there were some way to skip infancy….